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Melvin's blog
Nshima & Curry
Melvin's Blog
Nshima & Curry
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A GOOD MARRIAGE CAN BE A RELATIVE THING
If you've taken little interest in your relatives, avoiding
all those boring family get-togethers, here's some news that
may quickly change your attitude: Scientists have shown that
it's OK to procreate with your cousins.
Wait! I don't mean ALL your cousins. I don't even mean
one-at-a-time. It's better not to be greedy -- unless you
plan to move to Saudi Arabia and can afford a harem.
Anywhere else and you might want to be picky, choosing the
most suitable cousin, preferably one who's a little younger
than your parents.
This piece of good news is courtesy of the Journal of
Genetic Counseling, which recently published a study
indicating that children of cousin couples face only a
slightly higher risk of major genetic disorders than
average. The finding should boost the spirits of married
cousins, not to mention attendance at family reunions. (The
Journal of Genetic Counseling is already the most popular
publication in West Virginia.)
This is particularly good news to many people in my native
country, India, where cousin marriages are nothing strange.
In some Indian communities, the parents of a man's female
cousin give him the right of first refusal (the right to say
no before other men do).
A shrewd man, faced with the prospect of marrying an
unattractive cousin, holds onto this right for as long as
possible, until he's absolutely certain she has finished
blossoming.
Father of potential bride: "My dear nephew, please make up
your mind. We want our daughter married soon."
Nephew: "Just a few more years, Uncle. The older she gets,
the more attractive she becomes."
Father: "But how long can we wait? She has already turned
60. Believe me, dear nephew, she isn't getting any
prettier -- Your vision is just getting poorer."
As a young boy, I was often told that I would marry my
paternal aunt's daughter. My relatives seemed to take great
pleasure in telling me this, not realizing how much they
were frightening me.
It's not that my cousin was homely or something. It's just
that I wanted to marry someone with whom I had more in
common than just grandparents.
But I grew to reconsider my opposition to cousin marriage --
and not just because one of my cousins blossomed into a
Miss. India. (And a Miss. World finalist!)
Cousin marriage -- still illegal in some U.S. states --
offers a number of benefits. First and foremost, you get to
keep the wealth within your family. In my case, the wealth
consisted of three chickens and two goats. I'm still baffled
why no one showed up at the family reunions.
Second, you don't have to spend much money on the wedding,
because, with common relatives, you'll have fewer pests. I
mean, guests. You won't have to host a thousand distant
relatives, including your great uncle's sister-in-law's
nephew's fourth cousin twice removed, whom you'd like to
remove a third time.
Third, your children would have an easier time tracing their
roots. Of course, they may complain about this. "Dad, how
come my friend's family tree has more branches than mine? Is
it because you and Mom didn't branch out?"
Fourth, you won't have to dread meeting the in-laws, because
you already know them as uncle and aunt. They will get along
just dandy with your parents.
Of course, if you get a divorce, it could split your entire
family. Even worse, your family may stay together and you'll
have to keep seeing your former spouse.
Now that's frightening.
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