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Melvin's blog
Nshima & Curry
Melvin's Blog
Nshima & Curry
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FEWER CATNAPS, MORE DOGGED
EXERCISE
It was bound to happen. It was only a matter of time before
we went from overweight adults to overweight children to --
you guessed it -- overweight pets. Yes, in case you're
wondering, your dog Rover isn't supposed to resemble a beach
ball. He's supposed to know how to "roll over," not "roll
away."
As many as one-quarter of dogs and cats in the Western world
are overweight, according to a report from the National
Research Council. I don't mean to preach, but it's a sad
state of affairs when dogs are getting fat in the West while
in some parts of the East people are dying to eat, even just
once, a fat dog.
Most pet owners in America don't mean to overfeed their
pets. They just treat dogs and cats like they would anyone
else who lounges on their furniture. "Hey Rover," they say.
"Care for another beer? What about some cheese curls? Just
don't spoil your appetite, buddy, because we're having your
favorite for dinner: lobster."
Part of the problem, of course, is that pet foods are too
high in calories. Pet food companies don't seem to realize
that a dog or cat doesn't need that many calories in its
regular food, especially when it's planning to eat a
high-calorie dessert. After you include snacks and
appetizers, the average pet consumes enough calories in a
day to make Sarah Ferguson envious.
But it's not just overeating that causes pets to gain
weight. It's also lack of exercise. Most pets get only as
much exercise as their owners do, which can be a little or a
lot, depending on how far the refrigerator is from the
couch.
Almost all dogs do get walked, but considering how much they
eat, what they really need is a gym membership. An hour on
the treadmill should do the trick, though you can't go wrong
with a little weight training. Dogs have muscles, too, you
know.
Cats, on the other hand, are the laziest pets in the world,
even lazier than Chia pets. If you have a cat and you want
to give it some exercise, I have only one piece of advice
for you: get a dog. Not just any old mutt, but the type of
pugnacious hound that will put the fear of dog in anyone.
Perhaps you're wondering why you should care about your
pet's weight. Perhaps you're asking yourself, "What's wrong
with a fat cat? So what if my dog can't fit into his silk
pajamas? I'll just buy him another pair." Well, the answer
is simple: an overweight pet is susceptible to a number of
serious health problems, including heart disease,
hypertension, arthritis and diabetes, and if you think
that's bad, wait till you see the vet's bill.
But don't worry. There are many ways to get your pets in
shape. Here are just a few:
---Limit the amount of television they watch. Ten hours a
day is usually sufficient.
---Serve them only low-calorie drinks, such as light beer
and diet soda.
---Avoid giving them fried foods, including french fries,
fried chicken, and fried green tomatoes.
---Don't let your pets eat on the couch. Make them sit at
the dining table. Someone ought to.
---Hire a personal trainer. It may seem expensive, but not
as expensive as open heart surgery.
Remember to treat your pets like you'd treat yourself -- if
you only had an ounce of willpower.
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